How City Hall Resegregated Dallas

Segregation. The word itself feels like a tough question on an American history exam. In the year 2013, how in the world could Dallas, the nation’s ninth largest city, have put itself in a picture most Americans probably associate with police dogs snarling at children in black and white newsreels…

How to Make a New Holiday Tradition at Jerry World

Sometimes a lack of tradition can be a tradition unto itself. I think there are people in my life who feel bad about that, but having no obligations during the holidays brings the same wild sense of freedom as having a vacation day while the rest of the world works…

Eminem’s “The Monster,” Ft. Rihanna: Why This Song Sucks

Editor’s Note: Shea Serrano is an award-winning music writer and goofball whose recent exploits include Bun B’s Rapper Coloring and Activity Book. In his new column, he writes about his life and times. Song: Eminem’s “The Monster,” featuring Rihanna History: Eminem did a freestyle battle. He went up against Papa…

Six Ways to Ruin Everyone’s Lives with Karaoke

It’s the holidays! Time for you and your dopey friends from high school to reunite and tear up the town. What’ll it be this evening: pouring manure on your hated gym teacher’s front door step and then urinating on it? Getting trashed and picking a fight with the bully who…

Why Your Band Doesn’t Need Merch

Are you a musician? Is your group having issues? Ask Fan Landers! Critic Jessica Hopper has played in and managed bands, toured internationally, booked shows, produced records, worked as a publicist and is the author of The Girls’ Guide to Rocking, a how-to for teen ladies. She is here to…

The Most Intolerable Fan Bases in Music

Surfer Blood. Vampire Weekend. Imagine Dragons. Bowling for Soup. Slightly Stoopid. I’ve ignored every single one of these bands for one reason and one reason alone: terrible band names. In this culture, we have so many things competing for our attention at all times that your brain naturally has an…

Five Things You Will Find at Every Massive Pop Show

Earlier this week Justin Timberlake took his immaculately conceived three-hour extravaganza to American Airlines Center. It was the perfect pop show, utterly devoid of commentary — just the larger-than-live presence of a star and his silky-smooth musical meal. Lest we sound disparaging here, it should be said: You can ask…

Who Needs Coffee?

Dear Mexican: I find myself at odds with my peers because I don’t like coffee or coffee drinks. I need to find a substitute beverage that will be tasty yet somehow hip. I’ve heard that Mexicans have magical chocolate drinks called atole, champurrado and chocolate, but I don’t know what…

Dirty Business Could Wash Away a South Dallas Car Wash

Last week late one afternoon I had a long chat with Sam Merten, former colleague, now the spokesman for Dallas Mayor Mike Rawlings, about a letter the city sent to a South Dallas businessman, also a guy I have known for years, threatening to take his business away from him…

R. Kelly’s Black Panties: A Cute Animal for Every Song

Editor’s Note: Shea Serrano is an award-winning music writer and goofball whose recent exploits include Bun B’s Rapper Coloring and Activity Book. In his new column, he writes about his life and times. Here’s what you need to know about Robert Sylvester Kelly: He’s the fucking best. At singing. At…

KXT’s Sarah Jane Semrad on the Value of Independent Radio

Sarah Jane Semrad’s first local show was Course of Empire. And so it began. Nowadays, SJ is easily one of the most important and hard-working people in our local music community. She’s marketing director at KKXT-FM 91.7, a station riveted in local music support, where it’s pretty damn satisfying to…

The Ten Best Grunge Bands

A couple of weeks ago, Pearl Jam played the American Airlines Center and rocked the hell out of the place. But after all of these years, can anyone still call Pearl Jam a grunge band? As someone who was in college when the grunge sound came wallowing out of Seattle,…