The Mavs Are Now Monitoring Players While They Sleep

The Dallas Mavericks, with the advent of in-game GPS devices that tracks a player’s every twitch and movement, are already gleaning the last scraps of data available to measure on-court performance. Now it’s onto the next frontier: watching players while they sleep. The term of art that’s been coined for…

Nolan Ryan Is Leaving the Rangers

For a while now, at least since March, the writing on the wall has suggested that Nolan Ryan’s exit from the Rangers’ front office was imminent. That writing has now migrated from the wall and into an official announcement from the club. His tenure as CEO officially ends on Halloween…

The Red Bull Air Race Is Coming to North Texas

As insanely dangerous as the event sounds — it consists of flimsy-looking stunt planes weaving through a series of large pylons at 200-plus miles per hour — there has been only one crash in eight years of Red Bull Air Races. It happened in 2010 in Perth, Australia, during a…

Deion Sanders Is 86 Percent Impaired, Workers Comp Claim Says

Deion Sanders, who has accused other NFL athletes of faking their head injuries for money, is cognitively impaired, four doctors have determined. Sanders has had no problem using his pedestal as a Hall of Famer and television analyst to talk shit about other former NFL players suffering brain damage. “The…

The Fort Worth Cats Can’t Even Afford Porta-Potties

The Fort Worth Cats, Cowtown’s minor league baseball club, was supposed to make good on its debts on January 15, 2013. That’s at least what the team’s owner, former Congressman John Bryant, told us last December, explaining that the team was experiencing an acute but temporary cash shortage after the…