You Betcha: Week 4

If Mr. Jordan could somehow put the ghost of Joe Pendleton into the body of Marc Bulger, then maybe the Rams would have a chance Sunday. Two words: Trap. Game. Your 3-0 Cowboys believe their poop is perfume. The 0-3 St. Louis Rams are injured, insulted and, incredibly dangerous. Not…

Wood on Woods (Or: Silver Balls)

Remember how little Charlie Bucket finds a golden ticket and gets to tour Willie Wonka’s chocolate factory? This is a similar tale. Except Charlie Bucket is Arlington’s Steve Wood, the golden ticket is actually a silver golf ball, and Mr. Wonka is none other than, gulp, Tiger Woods. Wood, 40,…

Roy Tarpley Returns, This Time to Sue the Dallas Mavericks

There are two words no more heartbreaking to Dallas Mavericks fans than “Roy” and “Tarpley.” Exactly two decades ago, he was named to the NBA’s All-Rookie team — while, at the same time, he was being ordered to enter the league’s rehab center for chemical abuse. It was the first…

Pete Sampras Returns to Royalty

Elvis played a sold-out Cotton Bowl in 1956. Pavarotti serenaded Reunion Arena in 1995, and at the 2004 Byron Nelson Classic, Tiger Woods received a standing ovation—upon exiting a portable toilet. And there he was last Saturday night, the latest star near his career’s apex to pass through Dallas. But…

Batter Worlds

From human hands, to leather gloves. On the heels of the highly successful and semi-controversial exhibition delving into the human body, the Dallas Museum of Nature & Science this week debuts its kindler, gentler endeavor — baseball. In conjunction with the State Fair of Texas, the DMNS will host Baseball…

Cuban Dancing

New York magazine’s reporting that the Dallas Mavs owner has “no chance” of ever owning the Chicago Cubs. A billion dollars he would disagree with the assessment. There’s a crazy story in New York magazine that says the Yanks’ third baseman, Alex Rodriguez, might be outta NYC at the end…

!Viva Los Vaqueros!

Was that the Twilight Zone or Telemundo? Either way, the Cowboys’ utter dismantling of the defending NFC Champion Chicago Bears was bizarre, shocking and, let’s face it, delicious. 13-10? Maybe. 34-10? Pinch me. In Dallas a 3-0 start means the Cowboys are going to the Super Bowl. While in Chicago,…

The Havoc of Force

Mark Stuertz John Force lights a nifty burnout before a qualifying run on Saturday. One day later, his car was cut in half, and Force was in the hospital. You could see who had the Force just by wandering through the pits. While there was a small swell around Tommy…

You Betcha: Week 3

Jack Hamm/Grace Bible Fellowship Need we remind you of what Tom Landry thought of gambling? Thought so. I know what you’re thinking: Hey, douchebag, what happened to Week 2? To which I retort, “What happens in Vegas haunts you all the way back to Dallas.” Find a comfy chair and…

We Could Be Heroes. Or Not.

Comic Book Resources offers two very odd green-screen preview pics from this week’s Sunday Night Football intro, in which Terrell Owens and Heroes’ Masi Oka vie for the title of — here it comes — most heroic. Guess it couldn’t be any worse than this. –Robert Wilonsky…

Racin’ to the Big Stage with Dale and Eddie

Now Dale Jr. is a PepsiCo man. We still prefer Dr Pepper. For those so inclined, a full transcript of Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s press conference yesterday at the Dallas Convention Center — where, as predicted, he became a PepsiCo pitchman — is available here. How long did this thing last,…

Re-Pete After Me

Pete Sampras is bringing his bag of yellow balls to Frisco this weekend. You could trek to Arlington this weekend to pay your last respects to a suck-ass baseball outfit that last night lost its 82nd game of 2007 and clinched its seventh losing season in the last eight years…

No One Wants Eddie LeBaron’s Balls

Someone call Norm Hitzges, pronto. A seller in Woodlake, California, is trying to unload a bunch of 1960 Dallas Cowboys artifacts — including autographed footballs and programs, including one from a pre-season game against the Los Angeles Rams in Oregon. The lot’s full of fascinating keepsakes — if you’re craving,…

The Cowboys’ Money in the Tank

Damn that Super Bowl scent is intoxicating. A 2-0 start, a void in the defensive line and, voila, the Dallas Cowboys are taking a chance on a guy known to stockpile more munitions than David Koresh. Dallas’ signing of gun-toting, run-stuffing Tank Johnson is, of course, vintage Jerry Jones. This…

The Moose Was Loose in the Senate

You really should take a minute or two out of your morning to read Daryl “Moose” Johnston’s testimony yesterday in front of the Senate Commerce Committee, which is investigating how the National Football League treats its former players. (Hint: not well at all.) It was powerful stuff, befitting a great…

Of Cubes and Cubs

Mark Cuban went to Wrigley Field last night, sat in the right-field bleachers and spent part of the game text-messagng Chicago Sun-Times columnist Jay Mariotti. The writer insists Cubs fans want Cuban to buy their team, and from the tone of his love letter to Cuban — not to mention…

High School Football: Too Big-Time for its Britches, Says One Writer

Dunno if you read this Friday, but Slate previewed Saturday night’s Miami Northwestern-Southlake Carroll game with an essay by Robert Andrew Powell, author of We Own This Game: A Season the in the Adult World of Youth Football. Even before Northwestern toppled Southlake Carroll 29-21 in front 31,896 on the…

How ‘Bout Them Cowboys’ Price Tag?

If you wanna know why Your Dallas Cowboys are worth $1.5 billion, here’s most of your reason right here. For the first time in eight years, Your Dallas Cowboys are the most valuable franchise in the National Football League — thanks to, you guessed it, that billion-dollar stadium Jerry Jones…

Texas Safety, Not So Safe

Apparently, Tyrell Gatewood just needs to stay out of the car. Bad news, Longhorn fans: “Texas senior safety Tyrell Gatewood remained in jail Thursday after his arrest on drug charges, the fifth arrest of a Longhorns player since June.” Also popped in the arrest was freshman defensive back Ben Wells,…

Romo Arigato

Considering his expansive portfolio, Jerry Jones seems a bright businessman. That’s why Tony Romo should receive a new contract. Today. Why wait? Evidenced by his scintillating five-touchdown performance in last Sunday night’s 45-35 season-opening win over the New York Giants, the Dallas Cowboys are blessed with one of the best—perhaps…

Dallas Sports Elite Swank It Up for Awards

Just give us the highlights, Scott. There won’t be a red carpet per se, but if you want to ooooh and ahhhh at the most swank of Dallas sports dignitaries all dressed up with somewhere to go, Tuesday is the night and The Fairmont Hotel is the place. It’s the…