We’re No. 2! We’re No. 2!

Same as it ever was. Same as it ever was. Same as it ever was. Came across a quote from Texas Rangers’ bench Art Howe this morning that summed up the perverted perspective of our local baseball team: “ … if we finish second, we’ve had a heck of a…

Week 1 Leftovers

Surprise, I’m here. Cowboys’ head coach Wade Phillips, whose crisp, hard-edged hair line looked not unlike Jimmy Johnson’s (when Sunday’s game started at least), just finished his Day After press conference at Valley Ranch. At look at what he said. And, of course, what I think about what he said:…

Boys Will Be Boys as Boys Will Be Boys Author Meets Emmitt Smith

Jeff Pearlman, whose tremendous Boys Will Be Boys: The Glory Days and Party Nights of the Dallas Cowboys Dynasty is due in stores a week from today, appeared on ESPN’s Outside the Lines yesterday, discussing Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones’ penchant for taking troubled cast-offs. Joining Pearlman was The Dallas…

Cowboys 28, Browns 10

1 down, 15 to go. I’ll expound on these during the week, but for now here’s my Top 10 knee-jerk reactions to the Cowboys’ season-opening victory in Cleveland: 10. After all those training-camp parlor tricks, Pacman Jones had the audacity to go out and bobble a friggin’ punt? 9. Gene…

Browns Fans Can See Into the Future

Should you happen to miss the first, oh, 10 plays Your Dallas Cowboys run Sunday against the Cleveland Browns in the Dawg Pound, the Browns forum on Scout.com has ’em for you. Here is but a taste: “Play action-fake handoff to Barber inside, Romo 13 yard pass to Witten in…

This Just In: Dallas’ Need for Cialis to Plunge Next Month

In a parallel universe, this photo is of me with some groupie chick. Big news from my wife over Labor Day: This guy has supplanted this guy atop her “list.” Alas, my rankings are unchanged. Anna Kournikova, feeble tennis resume be damned, remains the undisputed defending champion. Which is great…

Hard Knocks: Week 5

In the final analysis, no, actually, it wasn’t that great. Interesting, but not great. HBO’s Hard Knocks is over. Which means the season is beginning. After a five-week series that showed that – surprise! – two of the Cowboys’ leaders are Terrell Owens and Tank Johnson, we no longer have…

See, Josh Howard Was Right All Along

Tsk, tsk. NBA players – including, turns out, former South Oak Cliff star and 2006 Dallas High School Player of the Year Darrell Arthur – loves them some marijuana. But, like the Mavericks’ Josh Howard so infamously noted, in the off-season, man. The OFF-season. Not at rookie orientation. Dude?! –…

NFL Preview: The Quarterbacks

No. 1 in Jessica’s heart. No. 3 on my list. Not playing fantasy football for the first time in 20 years this fall has its consequences: More free time. More disposable income. Less contact with the geekdom subculture. But it also has me woefully unprepared for the NFL season, which…

Actual Cubbies Love Cubes

Over the weekend, Jan Hubbard found plenty of Chicago Cubs praying Mark Cuban will become the team’s next owner — unless I misunderstood first baseman Derrek Lee’s pronouncement, “I hope he gets the team.” John Cusack was a little more skeptical: “I think what he has to do is convince…

That ’70s Show

Squint real hard and see the similarities. At long last, the ’70s are back. Women are again wearing Halston. Television viewers are glued to CBS’ hit Swingtown. Two movies founded on the old decade’s staples of Star Wars and ABBA – The Clone Wars and Mamma Mia – were among…

World’s Fastest Human Doubles As Hall of Fame’s Slowest Inductee

The man. It’s over. The Cowboys’ preseason, that is, signaled by last night’s ho-hum victory over the Vikings. And the drama, climaxed when Pacman Jones was officially reinstated yesterday while eating a chicken sandwich and no doubt quenching his insatiable hunger for orange short shorts and legal cleavage at this…

Pacman Reinstated. I Know, “Duh.”

First Greggo. Now Pacman. Great week for second chances. Game on. In news that should surprise exactly no one, Dallas Cowboys’ cornerback/kick returner Pacman Jones has been fully reinstated by NFL commissioner Roger Goodell. He’ll be in uniform Sept. 7 in Cleveland. Was there ever any doubt? UPDATE: “This is…

Hard Knocks: Week 4

Admit it, “Barbie Carpenter” made you giggle. The five best moments from last night’s Hard Knocks: Week 4. Or did I miss something? 5. Receiver Patrick Crayton arriving late for a team meeting wearing only a towel. Anyone who remembers last season’s playoff loss to the Giants wasn’t surprised by…

Pony Down

June cometh! Justin goeth? Entering his junior season, Justin Willis already holds SMU’s all-time record with 51 touchdown passes. Last year, in which he was voted All-Conference USA honorable mention, he produced four of the top 15 most prolific total yardage games in school history. He’s started 22 of the…

Oh, no. It’s Romo!

Did the Cowboys just lose the Super Bowl? Did Tony Romo just lose his mojo? Did I just answer a question with a question? Just got my Sports Illustrated and guess who’s on the cover, defiantly laughing at the mag’s notorious jinx? That’s right, Tony Friggin’ Romo. Of course, it’s…