Will Your Texas Rangers Ever See First Place Again?

Notable deaths in the last week: Ed McMahon. Farrah Fawcett. Michael Jackson. Billy Mays. The Texas Rangers? After getting 1-hit last night by someone named Chad Gaudin and losing two of three to a San Diego Padres outfit that hadn’t won a series since Memorial Day, a Rangers’ team that led the…

The French Disconnection

Though I’m always skeptical when a head coach drafts a player 24th overall and then contends he “pin-pointed” the kid all along – see: Jimmy Johnson on 7th-rounder Leon Lett, circa 1991 – I’m willing to forge into the Rodrigue Beaubois Era with an open mind. Well, I lied. I won’t…

Tashard’s Tour

While watching this tour of Cowboys Stadium, keep reminding yourself that Tashard Choice is third string. Third. The video, shot after a recent OTA, includes cameos by Marion Barber III, Roy Williams, Jerry Jones and the Jonas Brothers. And it’s hosted by the chattiest of Cowboys, who apparently owns a…

Mavs Trade Down, Try Not to Fall Asleep

Like the Dallas Cowboys did a couple months ago, the Dallas Mavericks have made the decision to fortify their roster via quantity, not quality. But in an NBA Draft that features Blake Griffin, Hasheem Thabeet, James Harden and a bunch of extras, that might not be such a bad idea. Unwilling…

Lights Out!

Over on The Ticket, Mike Rhyner (aka “Baseball Jesus”, the cockiest nickname in the history of sports, by the way) is quick to identify the “catastrophic moment.” The play/incident/injury/whatever that signals the beginning of the end each Texas Rangers’ season. Over the past 37 years it’s usually been multiple choice…

Unbreaking News: Dirk Done with Gold-Digger

Dirk got duped. He went for an elaborate head fake and embarrassingly got caught in the air with nowhere to land. It could have been worse. Hpefully now that he’s talking about his ordeal with ex-fiancee Cristal Taylor in Germany it won’t be front-page news in Dallas. “I had some…

eBay, Schmebay — Look What the City’s Sellin’

Every so often, just for grins, I check out the auctions at Lone Star Online, which the city of Dallas, Dallas Area Rapid Transit, the Dallas Independent School District and other municipalities use to move surplus merch. Only, turns out the city of Dallas isn’t offloading flat-tire forklifts or Reunion…

Paging Mr. Jaramillo … Mr. Rudy Jaramillo.

This is a cruel joke. Texas Rangers fans who for decades have yearned for pitching are finally getting it, only to see their woody go limp when they finally need it. Something I thought I’d never type: The Rangers can’t pitch hit. Spent Father’s Day plopped on the couch not believing my…

Note to Self: Find My Old Bobby Moffat Jersey

Sunday afternoon at Dallas Farmers Market, Brandon Pollard broke the bad news: I’d somehow managed to miss an old-timers kick-around at Pizza Hut Park the day before featuring the likes of Bobby Moffat, Chad Deering, Tatu and, of course, the Texas Honeybee Guild’er buzzing around Shed One. (Ticket tie-in: Bob…

George W. Bush’s Fancy Box

As Tom Hicks is looking to sell his majority stake in the Texas Rangers, this MLB.com item concerning tonight’s invite-only doings at the Rangers Ballpark in Arlington will no doubt prompt reckless speculation:The Rangers are renaming the owner’s suite at Rangers Ballpark in Arlington after President George W. Bush. Bush,…

Dallas Cowboys: Three Dots and a Cloud of Dust

Quick takes from a Wednesday’s minicamp workout at Carrollton’s Standridge Stadium: *Tony Romo says the story that appeared in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram about him being told to lose weight is total bullshit. “That never happened,” Romo said with a smile. “It just didn’t.” … *From what I could tell,…

The Top 10 All-Time Texas Rangers in the History of Ever

Very cool moment last night: The greatest player in Texas Rangers history – now a Houston Astro – smacks a 5th-inning homer and receives a standing ovation. Stay classy, Arlington. On a day when Toby Harrah and Ruben Sierra were elected into the Rangers’ Hall of Fame, Ivan “Pudge” Rodriguez…

Shooting Star

So I’m gone a week and two major coaching deals? Ron Washington: In. Dave Tippett: Out. How can that be? I’ll get to Wash later this week, but I’m still trying to figure out new Stars’ GM Joe Nieuwendyk’s decision to replace the likeable Tippett with the long ago expired…

So, Which Are They: Real or Fake?

Two weeks ago I said that on June 15 – hello! – we’d know if the 2009 Texas Rangers were authentic or artificial. A pinch here. A jiggle there. Couple of healthy squeezes. And, of course, the taste test of a 5-7 stretch against some of of baseball’s best teams and the…

D.J. Mbenga 1, Dirk Nowitzki 0

Watching the Lakers party in Orlando last night – I was wrong about L.A. in 4, but just barely -was a reminder how cruel sports can be. While former Mavericks D.J. Mbenga and Josh Powell hugged and kissed the NBA’s Larry O’Brien championship trophy, current Maverick Dirk Nowitzki is left with remorse about…

Tony Romo Gets Faced

A Friend of Unfair Park sends us this link to Tony Romo’s Facebook page. Had no idea he was such a Glitter fan. Ahem. Redskins fans…