Let Bygones Be…Hey!

Two things we’ve learned about Terrell Owens: He can catch a football. And he can hold a grudge. In my cover story on Owens’ first training camp as a Dallas Cowboy, he talks about being “done” with former Eagles teammate Donovan McNabb. In last week’s ESPN The Magazine, Owens’ first…

Duane’s Debacle

Since Bill Parcells won’t, let me be perfectly clear: Drew Bledsoe’s three-interception pratfall in Jacksonville last Sunday did not create or ignite this Dallas Cowboys quarterback controversy. Neither did those damned media. Duane did. How’s that, you ask? Harken back to January 1 and recall what Duane “Bill” Parcells didn’t…

99 Problems But T.O. Ain’t One

When two of the NFL’s top three most valuable franchises play at Texas Stadium Sunday night, a lot will be riding on the outcome. Like, for example, the season. Only once in the franchise’s 46-year history have the Dallas Cowboys started 0-2 and made the playoffs. That was back in…

Mess on Mockingbird

While former Dallas-area quarterbacks are leading ranked teams to record performances, SMU’s Justin Willis is suffering through life on the Hilltop. Willis, the former standout at Denton Ryan High School, threw for a paltry 112 yards and was benched during Saturday’s abysmal 24-6 loss to North Texas. Meanwhile, former Southlake…

Fat Ain’t Phat

Or Is It? Shella Sattler is hot. She is a former cheerleader for the Dallas Cowboys and Los Angeles Clippers. She could pretty much seduce any guy in Dallas. But you know what? Shella craves fat dudes. Weird I know, but there’s a twist. Isn’t there always? When she’s not…

Chicken Little Suits Up

The Cowboys lost for a bunch of reasons Sunday. Chief among ’em? This guy. So much for 16-0. Your Dallas Cowboys have been playing football since 1960. After Sunday’s 24-17 loss to the Jacksonville Jaguars , poof, another chance at an undefeated season wasted. Here in Dallas, of course, the…

Re: Little Ball of Huh?

I just got a call from ESPN 103.3 FM station manager Peter Dits, who tried to explain the station’s decision to choose Jennifer Engel over Steve Dennis. “We made the decision to build the show around Jennifer,” Dits says. “Steve has a lot of talent, and hopefully he’ll stay around…

Little Ball of Huh?

Today’s sign of the apocalypse: Airing now on ESPN 103.3 FM, The new Little Ball of Hate Show. What earlier this week was a decent and maturing Dennis & Engel combo has abruptly deteriorated into a one-woman act with the surprise firing of Steve Dennis. The 9 a.m.-noon slot on…

Crystal (Foot) Ball

I hereby predict your Dallas Cowboys will win this Sunday in Jacksonville, go 10-6 this season and return to the NFL Playoffs. More important, I foresee no better place to watch the Cowboys this season than at the old Granada Theater on Greenville Avenue. Starting Sunday at 2:30 p.m., the…

The Battle for Metroplex Mediocrity

The University of North Texas will play SMU this weekend. So we hear. In case you’ve been too busy lighting another candle for the late, great Crocodile Hunter, the University of Texas hosts Ohio State Saturday in Austin in what is apparently the earliest ever College Football Game of the…

Instant Replay

You know what this blog needs? More pictures of Mike Doocy. Thank God he’s quoted below, because otherwise it would just seem creepy. As the NFL season kicks off tonight and the Dallas Cowboys open their season Sunday in Jacksonville, you’re probably not real happy that Time Warner cable (previously…

Fit to be Tied

Scott Murray apparently has one gig these days: hosting the DASA Awards Banquet. Will he, like, hit you with the highlights? Ties suck, unless you’re Troy Dungan, Anna Kournikova’s brother or a guy lucky enough to have tickets to next week’s Dallas All Sports Association Awards Banquet. The 41st annual…

Our Idiot Kicker

Sure enough, he’s a problem. The Dallas Cowboys awarded him that monstrous contract in the off-season for this? A mysterious injury that kept him sidelined most of preseason. The insufferable ego that has him resting on his résumé and shrugging off mistakes. A wobbly relationship with coach Bill Parcells. And,…

The Cockiest Cowboy

If you watched him shank two field goals in last week’s preseason tie, you couldn’t believe your eyes. And if you go to his Web site, you won’t believe your ears. Even before he scores his first point in Dallas, kicker Mike Vanderjagt is already the cockiest player in franchise…

Holiday Feast

Maybe some golf. Perhaps one last summer barbecue. Or, you could spend your Labor Day weekend scarfing down tamales–like, how about 100 of ’em? That’s what some carb-crazy contestants will attempt to do Saturday at 1 p.m. in Lewisville at the Dallas Tortilla and Tamale Factory World Tamale-Eating Championship. You’ve…

Ear Muffs, Tom Landry! Ear Muffs!

A return to glory: Jerry Jones has very, very special things in store for his Cowboys. I went to the Dallas Cowboys annual kick-off luncheon Thursday at the Hotel Intercontinental and treated my ears to a sound smorgasbord. There was rap music by Lil’ John, “Lights Out” by UFO and…

We’re No. 3! We’re No. 3!

Really, how can a team that employed Chan Gailey be worth more than a billion dollars? Does not seem right. Jerry Jones bought the Dallas Cowboys for $150 million in 1989; today, his team’s worth $1.2 billion, despite the fact Chan Gailey, Dave Campo and Barry Switzer have been head…

Anyone Need a Good Nelsoning?

Don Nelson can get ya 50 wins, no sweat. Then it’s off the bench and on to the beach, which is what happens when you got no defense. On Salon today, King Kaufman–a self-proclaimed “lapsed but still-sympathetic fan of the Golden State Warriors”–writes about former Dallas Mavericks head coach Don…

American Hero an American Idol?

Carly Patterson’s trying to make it as a singer on Fox. We can think of worse ideas, such as…uh…wait…uh…give us a sec. You’ve heard of the Sports Illustrated cover jinx, but the Richie Whitt Dallas Observer sports column jinx? I’m just sayin’. It almost got kick-started last night on the…

Whoa, Nellie?

Don Nelson’s getting back to basketball. Coulda sworn he quit forever when he left Dallas. Hunh. So now we know exactly how much Don Nelson disliked Mark Cuban. After quitting the Mavericks and saying he was just tired of the travel and ready to settle down with his wife on…

Rock and Role

With the signing of a first major title sponsor, the Dallas White Rock Marathon continues to run in the right direction. At a press conference this morning at Texas Scottish Rite Hospital for Children, race officials and Mayor Laura Miller announced that Atlanta-based real estate company Wellstone Communities has signed…

Owens’ Sausage

This picture was taken yesterday, when Jerry Jones tried to take back Terrell Owens’ jersey. Sorry. That’s just wishful thinking. I watched as late as I could, but it was exhausting and I was exhausted: Some time around 1:30 this morning, Andre Agassi won his first-round match at the U.S…