Phat Chance

You know Internet dating has become totally mainstream when Disney cranks out a bland comedy featuring a randomly selected pair of mismatched stars to take on the subject. Bearing the unwieldy and meaningless title Bringing Down the House, said comedy is predicated on the biggest pitfall of cyber-flirting, the idea…

River of Dreams

Emerging from Till Human Voices Wake Us, it was easy to overhear some male viewers striving to put the film’s metaphysical themes in their place, to explain them away, as it were. This is a shame. The source of the story’s mystique is fairly simple and may be obvious to…

French Kiss-Off

Apart from “I Am Fascinating” and/or “My Parents Are Horrid,” the reigning theme of film students’ movies is “Lovers Are Bonkers.” Thus, it comes as no surprise when a director’s first feature contains many elements that’ll be instantly familiar to anyone who’s ever hung around a film school. So it…

Rockin’ the Cradle

Uh…yo. The word on the street is that the ‘Drzej is back at the helm. “Who?” you rightfully ask. Why, cinematographer-turned-director Andrzej Bartkowiak, of course. He’s the…er…”dog” who, under the auspices of producer Joel Silver (Richie Rich, The Matrix), created the hip-hop bang-bang chop-socky flicks Romeo Must Die and Exit…

Cop Out

Dark Blue, it says in the credits, is based on a story by Los Angeles-born author James Ellroy, who pens grisly and guilt-ridden pulp-noir haiku that spread across hundreds of pages. Its screenplay was written by copper caper fetishist David Ayer, a native Angelino with an affinity for Hollywood-dark stories…

Gale Farce

Right-wing pundits will be coming out of the woodwork to holler about this one. Bad enough, they’ll say, that The Life of David Gale attacks the death penalty; it also features a caricature governor of Texas with big ears and a familiar, scripture-quoting smirk. There’s a character who notes that…

Will Power

Someone’s got to say it, so let’s start here: We’ve underestimated Will Ferrell. Honestly, it wasn’t that hard to do. His Saturday Night Live stint was never impressive, as he’d often fall back on the same shtick of yelling his lines with detailed enunciation in a passive-aggressive tone that made…

Killing in the Name of…

People engaged in warfare always believe that God endorses their cause and not their opponent’s. The Civil War drama Gods and Generals is filled with so much religious righteousness–endless Bible-readings, urgent recitation of prayer and ardent supplications to the Lord, to say nothing of the heavenly choir that intermittently bursts…

Sand Through an Hourglass

Thanks to the fickleness of pop culture, the French writer Aurore Dupin (1804-1876), a.k.a. George Sand, may well be better known for her relationship to Frederic Chopin than for her novels or her other romances or her generally bold life. Back in 1991, James Lapine’s Impromptu focused on the Sand-Chopin…

Secret No More

It begins in an almost playful mood. In a gallery of ancient art, a handsome, well-dressed man (Andrea Renzi) begins to make a pass at an equally attractive woman (Margherita Buy), who slyly rebuffs him. As we quickly learn, they’re actually husband and wife. Then, just as quickly, the direction…

You, Me, Him

His is an estimable and enviable filmography–not a bad movie to be found, if you’re willing to overlook Patch Adams, Twister and a few smaller offerings no one saw anyway. But even in the worst of films, and even in drag opposite Robert De Niro, Philip Seymour Hoffman keeps intact…

Bloody Hell

The fanboy suckled at the teat of comic-book writer-artist Frank Miller, circa 1980-81, will be satisfied, for the most part, with this cinematic Daredevil; if nothing else, the thing’s got enough Marvel Comics in-jokes to amuse ’em down at the comics shop for ages, or at least till Hulk smashes…

Quiet Strength

While virtually no one in this country foresaw the American disaster in Vietnam, the late British writer Graham Greene glimpsed it with astonishing clarity a decade before the first U.S. “adviser” set foot on Vietnamese soil. Greene’s 1955 novel The Quiet American, which has now been made into a disturbing…

Anarchy in the U.K.

If nothing else, because there’s nothing else to this movie, Shanghai Knights allows Jackie Chan, he of halting dialogue and poetic movement, to pay direct homage to his idols. He hangs from the arms of Big Ben, dangling off the stories-tall clock like Harold Lloyd in 1923’s Safety First; he…

Hudson Hawked

Astaire & Rogers. Hepburn & Tracy. Heck, Ball & Arnaz, Houston & Washington or Vardalos & Corbett. Over the decades, Hollywood has proven that its romantic comedies needn’t suck. But alas, they often do, as is the case with How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. Clearly, bigwig co-producers…

See No Eva

Director Gary Hardwick’s first film, The Brothers, was a refreshing take on the single black man romantic comedy, offering a surprisingly mature perspective full of depth and well-rounded characters without resorting to the time-honored stereotypes of black man as player and black woman as ball-busting bitch. Hardwick wrote the script…

Twisted Logic

Director Roger Donaldson was part of a wave of Australian talent who went Hollywood in the ’80s, but he hasn’t fared as well here as colleagues like Peter Weir, Phillip Noyce and George Miller. His biggest hit was probably Cocktail, and his best American film was either Species or No…

Blowin’ Smoke

First off, make no mistake: Biker Boyz is not, and has no intentions of being, The Fast and the Furious on two wheels, which will be considered a serious shame by the 12- to 12-year-old demographic who were hoping to chug a little more Diesel fuel till the official sequel’s…

Cosmic Debris

There are enough good scenes within the 94 minutes of The Guru to make an entertaining coming-attractions trailer. Wait, that’s unfair. Such previews are only one minute long. It’s simplistic and snarky to say there are only 60 seconds of fun to be found in this “Bollywood-meets-Hollywood” romantic comedy. I’m…

Max Factors

Hitler as artist…Hitler as artist…Damn. So much for the ol’ “summarize plot, tease overpaid actors, pontificate wildly” formula. Reviewing Max–about the wonder years of Der Führer (Noah Taylor) and his eponymous, fictional Jewish benefactor Max Rothman (John Cusack)–looks to be something of a task. Set in 1918 Munich, this confident…

A Toothy Grin

Once upon a time, in the town of Darkness Falls… “Wait,” you’re probably saying to yourself, “Darkness Falls is the name of the town?” Yes. Yes, it is. And it’s haunted by an evil tooth fairy. Are you sure you want to know more? OK, good. Because once you get…

God Forsaken

Ever since Amores Perros burst onto the international scene two years ago, Latin American cinema has been experiencing one of the most fertile periods in its history. Encompassing such works as Alfonso Cuaron’s Y Tu Mamá También and Walter Salles’ Behind the Sun, these socially conscious, frequently brutal portraits of…